Clumsy or Just in Love?

San Geraldo watches out for me. Always. And his concern becomes especially pronounced following one of my careless moments. Like after I’ve sliced off the tip of my finger while cutting kitchen tiles; or knocked myself out by standing up at full-speed and slamming the bridge of my nose into the car’s hatchback that I forgot was open… on three different occasions… on three different cars… (or in the same way, the top of my head into the fireplace mantle; my eye into the kitchen cabinet; the back of my head into the table…); or after I’ve picked up the cast-iron pot lid with my bare hand even though I had just been told it had that moment come out of the oven; or stuck my hand blindly into a shrub to extract a dead leaf only to be stung by a bee (I’m allergic) hiding in the leaf that I decided to hand-pulverize (thus shooting every last bit of venom into my finger); or — most recently — after I’ve rolled out of bed and onto the floor.

San Geraldo me cuida. Siempre. Y su preocupación se vuelve especialmente pronunciada después de uno de mis momentos de descuido. Como después de cortarme la punta del dedo mientras cortaba los azulejos de la cocina; o noquearme poniéndome de pie a toda velocidad y golpeando el puente de mi nariz contra la puerta trasera del auto que olvidé que estaba abierta… en tres ocasiones diferentes… en tres autos diferentes… (o de la misma manera , la parte superior de mi cabeza en el manto de la chimenea, mi ojo en el armario de la cocina, la parte posterior de mi cabeza en la mesa…); o después de haber levantado con la mano desnuda la tapa de la olla de hierro fundido aunque me acababan de decir que en ese momento había salido del horno; o metía mi mano a ciegas en un arbusto para extraer una hoja muerta solo para ser picado por una abeja (soy alérgica) escondida en la hoja que decidí pulverizar a mano (disparando así hasta el último trozo de veneno en mi dedo); o, más recientemente, después de que me levanté de la cama y me tiré al suelo.

A DAILY DISH OF DELICIOUS, WITH A LIFE OF ITS OWN.
UN PLATO DIARIO DELICIOSO, CON VIDA PROPIA.

Every evening, San Geraldo, prepares a plate of cheese, crackers, and apple slices for me to enjoy while I sit at my computer. Usually, I help out by carrying it from the kitchen myself (again, it’s the very least I can do). The crackers and apples tend to slide around on the plate if you move too fast. They can easily fly off the plate and onto the floor. Every single day, as I pick up the full plate, San Geraldo says, “Be careful now.”

Todas las noches, San Geraldo, prepara un plato de queso, galletas saladas y rebanadas de manzana para que disfrute mientras estoy sentado en mi computadora. Por lo general, ayudo llevándolo desde la cocina yo mismo (de nuevo, es lo mínimo que puedo hacer). Las galletas y las manzanas tienden a deslizarse por el plato si te mueves demasiado rápido. Pueden salir volando fácilmente del plato y caer al suelo. Todos los días, cuando recojo el plato lleno, San Geraldo dice: “Ten cuidado ahora”.

LUNCH AT CAFE SANTA MARTA YESTERDAY. (CHURCH OF SAN ANDRES IN BACKGROUND).
FLAMENQUIN. HAM ROLLED AROUND CHICKEN AND CHEESE, AND THEN BATTERED AND DEEP-FRIED.
HOT, MELTY, (OBSCENE), AND DANGEROUS ON SO MANY LEVELS.
ALMUERZO EN CAFE SANTA MARTA AYER. (IGLESIA DE SAN ANDRÉS AL FONDO).
FLAMENQUIN. JAMÓN ENROLLADO ALREDEDOR DE POLLO Y QUESO, Y LUEGO REBOZADO Y FRITO.
CALIENTE, MELTY, (OBSCENE), Y PELIGROSO EN TANTOS NIVELES.

Whenever I pick up a knife in the kitchen, San Geraldo warns, “Don’t cut yourself.”

Cada vez que cojo un cuchillo en la cocina, San Geraldo me advierte: “No te cortes”.

CHERRIES. “THEY HAVE PITS.”
CEREZAS. “TIENEN HUESOS”.

When he puts a pan from the stove into the sink, San Geraldo looks lovingly into my eyes. Then he smiles and says, “Hot.”

I’d be offended if I didn’t so need the reminders.

Cuando pone una cacerola de la estufa en el fregadero, San Geraldo me mira a los ojos con amor. Luego sonríe y dice: “Caliente”.

Me ofendería si no necesitara tanto los recordatorios.

THE DANGERS OF SLEEPING:
(DOING MUCH BETTER SINCE I SHAVED THE AREA TO PREP FOR THE BANDAGE).
NEVER TO BE SHOWN: THE BLACK & BLUE ON MY RIGHT GLUTE.
LOS PELIGROS DE DORMIR:
(ESTÁ MUCHO MEJOR DESDE QUE AFEITÉ EL ÁREA PARA PREPARAR EL VENDAJE).
NUNCA SE MOSTRARÁ: EL NEGRO Y EL AZUL EN MI GLÚTEO DERECHO.

Since my roll out of bed and onto the floor Thursday morning, a new caution has been added to the list. When I say goodnight, San Geraldo now says, “Sleep well,” and then adds, “And be careful.”

Desde que me levanté de la cama y caí al piso el jueves por la mañana, se agregó una nueva precaución a la lista. Cuando digo buenas noches, San Geraldo ahora dice: “Que duermas bien”, y luego agrega: “Y ten cuidado”.

NO CAUTIONS NEEDED FOR LAST NIGHTS HOME-MADE BANANA BREAD!
(WELL… “SMALL BITES.”)
¡NO SE NECESITAN PRECAUCIONES PARA LAS ÚLTIMAS NOCHES DE PAN DE PLÁTANO CASERO!
(BUENO… “PEQUEÑOS MORDIDOS”).

If this had all started only after I had met San Geraldo all those years ago, I’d say, ‘I just can’t help it. It’s love.’ It is that. But, sometimes, I’m just plain clumsy.

Si todo esto hubiera comenzado solo después de haber conocido a San Geraldo hace tantos años, diría: ‘Simplemente no puedo evitarlo. Es amor.’ Eso es. Pero, a veces, soy simplemente torpe.

Author: Moving with Mitchell

From Brooklyn, New York; to North Massapequa; back to Brooklyn; Brockport, New York; back to Brooklyn... To Boston, Massachusetts, where I met Jerry... To Marina del Rey, California; Washington, DC; New Haven and Guilford, Connecticut; San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, and Santa Barbara, California; Las Vegas, Nevada; Irvine, California; Sevilla, Spain. And Fuengirola, Málaga..

28 thoughts on “Clumsy or Just in Love?”

  1. Remind me when you come to visit us in Florida to put away all the knives and childproof sharp edges, etc. Well, that may already be done since Savannah will be roaming around the house.

    saludos,
    raulito

    PS: next time you have one of those obscenely delicious snacks also raise your "caña" or your "copa" and think of me.

    saludos,
    raulito

  2. Oh dear! Look what you did – drunk again!!!
    Was Nick Flamel there at the time, did he push you? You did make me laugh. Hope you get fixed up real soon!
    Di
    xoxo

    1. YONKS:
      It hadn't dawned on me that it might have been Nick Flame's doing! Do you suppose he followed us from Vegas?

      I'm sure I will be even better tomorrow. The bruises now hurt more than the cuts/scrapes. I suppose that's a good sign.

  3. Oh Mitch, Mitch! (Shakes head sorrowfully) – yes, if you ever pop over to visit I'll have to keep all the sharp instruments locked away. This made me laugh so hard over my morning coffee!

    1. Judith:
      There's not much risk at your house. I do tend to keep my distance from other people's sharp objects. But every night here when I wash up after dinner I come close to slicing a finger.

  4. I love "flamenquin"s and since moving to Spain, cherries have become one of my favorite foods! so good! AND homemade banana bread?! Awesome…

    1. Brittany:
      The banana bread was incredible. Jerry hasn't made it since we've been here. It really made it taste like home. (And those Canary Island bananas are so much better!) And, man, have we been going through the cherries this past week.

  5. My Goodness! You're just an accident waiting to happen! Good thing you have such a loving person to take care of you. Just curious… who trims your beard? I hope you don't do it yourself 😉

    1. The Odd Essay:
      Only problem is Jerry has always come close to fainting at the sight of blood. Fortunately, he's had so much exposure in the past 30 years, that it's no so much a problem for him anymore.

      And I'll have you know I trim my own beard! OK… I use an electric beard trimmer. But I finish off my mustache with scissors… And, well, I HAVE cut my upper lip with those scissors several times.

    1. Elaine:
      Hmmm… But maybe that's why he made banana bread — to get rid of them all at once. And, interestingly, he put the banana peels into the trash. He usually just leaves his cooking mess for me to clean up. Hmmm…

  6. Mitch, this,in parts, so reminds of a certain fellow I am in love with! He scares the be$%#@! out of me at times and he tends to trip over things, anything, tip things over, and hit his head on the hatchback door too!! What is it about you two?
    Jerry! Where did we go wrong! lol Oh yes! He was just 20 feet up a ladder cutting down tree limbs and I was having a heart attack! No respect for us sensitive types!

    1. Jim:
      Our minds are simply occupied with more important things and we have very inattentive guardian angels, which is why we need you and Jerry.

      (You would never catch me 20 feet up a ladder cutting down tree limbs… I didn't mention the time I cut through the extension cord while trimming the hedge in front of the hotel.)

  7. It's a good thing that you heal well, under the circumstances. It's doubly good that you have Jerry looking after you. I made banana bread today, as well. I bought bananas at one grocery store and forgot and bought some more at another store. What can you do but make banana bread–and of course, eat it!

    1. Ms. Sparrow:
      Oh, how I love banana bread and it's an extra special treat here. Not something you find in the cafés. It really brought back good memories. I'm always grateful when the bananas ripen too much!

    1. Judith:
      Yes, it is! And thanks for the comps. I will pass them on. We were both pleased with how it came it given it was the first time Jerry had made it in Spain. The ingredients and our oven are full of surprises.

  8. Everyone needs a San Geraldo at times mine is San Pedro who scrapes me up when I fall or do those stupid things. I didn't beatify him a friend did when she heard of the events which had taken place. Now as for banana loaf I love to eat it and this one looks a fine specimen well done that chef. 🙂

    1. the cuby poet:
      Yep, I'm very grateful to have my own resident Santo (who, thankfully, isn't really all that saintly). And he makes a devilishly good banana bread (his mother's recipe).

Please share your thoughts...

Discover more from Moving with Mitchell

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading