La versión en español está después de la versión en inglés.
The Kid Brother phoned at 10:35 Tuesday night. I had timed the last episode of “Fellow Travelers” to finish at 10:50 so I’d be ready for our call at 11. I tried to answer and the call failed. I then noticed that he had tried to call on FaceTime. He doesn’t have an iPhone. I have no idea where he even got the idea of FaceTime. We paused the show and I tried calling him back but FaceTime wouldn’t work because, as the message said, he doesn’t have a FaceTime compatible machine. For us to chat on FaceTime would require me to initiate the call and send him an invitation to join, and that would be too confusing for him. I tried WhatsApp, the app that he accidentally wiped from his phone, again, weeks ago. No go.
I waited until 11 and phoned his landline. No reason given for why or how he tried FaceTime. I explained the app to him. I suggested again that he get help from his office or from T-Mobile.
“I was just there to pay!” he snapped.
“It’s 5 minutes away. You can go again.”
“OK. OK. I’ll go at the end of the month.” [when the next payment is due]
I told him there was no reason to wait that long and that the cats and I miss seeing his face. I said please go to the office and get help. I know it’s not going to happen. He clearly doesn’t like the staff.
Phone calls with him often suck. Lots of dead air and I hang up exhausted. Not that I’m not exhausted after some of our video calls, but they’re much easier and he’s more engaged. We talked a bit more (or I did) and he gave me one-word responses to whatever I said, which is what he tends to do on traditional phone calls. And he was even in a good mood! When I hung up, I muttered, “Give me strength!” That’s actually much milder than what I mutter the rest of the day over nothing.
While hanging clothes Thursday, I dropped clothes pins 12 times. I don’t know what I said after the 12th drop, but San Geraldo called out from the kitchen concerned that something was seriously wrong. When I heard myself tell him what I was so angry about, I couldn’t be angry anymore. Still, an enormous gin and tonic would be nice. Today’s photo is from my uncle’s home bar in 1968. The pitcher I’m holding reads “I BET YOU CAN’T.” I’m sure it’s true but I’d still like to give it a try.
Some years ago, San Geraldo bought “The Everything Spanish Grammar Book.” It’s been sitting on a shelf in my office for ages and I finally picked it up the other day. Surprisingly, I’m enjoying it. I’m comfortable enough now to care about the details of present, preterite, imperfect, future, conditional, imperfect subjunctive, command, present participle, and even past participle. I use many of them already but have no idea what’s what. Somehow I’ve made it through a lifetime of English without being able to identify most of them. Another fun thing is I’ve finally learned more about punctuation and quotes, which can be entirely different from English. Conversations should be punctuated with long dashes instead of quotation marks. I had no idea and I must admit I find it a bit confusing. Still, there’ll be some changes made to my writing style.
El Hermanito me llamó a las 22:35 de la noche del martes. Había programado el último episodio de “Fellow Travelers” para que terminara a las 22:50, de modo que estaría listo para nuestra llamada a las 23:00. Intenté responder y la llamada falló. Entonces me di cuenta de que había intentado llamar por FaceTime. No tiene un iPhone. No tengo idea de dónde sacó la idea de FaceTime. Pausamos el programa e intenté devolverle la llamada, pero FaceTime no funcionaba porque, como decía el mensaje, no tiene un dispositivo compatible con FaceTime. Probé WhatsApp, la aplicación que borró accidentalmente de su teléfono, nuevamente, semanas atrás. No funcionó.
Esperé hasta las 23:00 y llamé a su teléfono fijo. No me dio ninguna razón de por qué o cómo intentó usar FaceTime. Le expliqué la aplicación. Le sugerí nuevamente que pidiera ayuda en su oficina o en T-Mobile.
—¡Justo estaba allí para pagar! —espetó.
—Está a 5 minutos. Puedes ir de nuevo.
—OK. OK. Iré a fin de mes. —[cuando vence el próximo pago]
Le dije que no había razón para esperar tanto y que los gatos y yo extrañamos ver su cara. Le dije que por favor fuera a la oficina y pidiera ayuda. Sé que eso no va a suceder. Está claro que no le gusta el personal.
Las llamadas telefónicas con él suelen ser un auténtico desastre. Mucho silencio y cuelgo exhausta. No es que no esté agotada después de algunas de nuestras videollamadas, pero son mucho más fáciles y él está más involucrado. Hablamos un poco más (o lo hice) y me dio respuestas de una palabra a todo lo que dije, que es lo que suele hacer en las llamadas telefónicas tradicionales. ¡Y hasta estaba de buen humor! Cuando colgué, murmuré: —¡Dame fuerzas! En realidad, eso es mucho más suave que lo que murmuro el resto del día por nada.
Mientras colgaba la ropa el jueves, se me cayeron pinzas de ropa 12 veces. No sé qué dije después de la 12ª caída, pero San Geraldo me llamó desde la cocina preocupado de que algo estuviera muy mal. Cuando me oí decirle por qué estaba tan enojada, ya no pude enojarme más. Aun así, un enorme gin tonic estaría bien. La foto de hoy es del bar de la casa de mi tío en 1968. La jarra que sostengo dice “APUESTO A QUE NO PUEDES”. Estoy seguro de que es verdad, pero aún así me gustaría intentarlo.
Hace algunos años, San Geraldo compró “The Everything Spanish Grammar Book”. Ha estado en un estante en mi oficina durante años y finalmente lo tomé el otro día. Sorprendentemente, lo estoy disfrutando. Ahora me siento lo suficientemente cómodo como para preocuparme por los detalles del presente, pretérito, imperfecto, futuro, condicional, imperfecto de subjuntivo, mandato, participio presente e incluso participio pasado. Ya uso muchos de ellos, pero no tengo idea de qué es qué. De alguna manera, he logrado pasar toda una vida de inglés sin poder identificar la mayoría de ellos. Otra cosa divertida es que finalmente aprendí más sobre puntuación y comillas, que pueden ser completamente diferentes del inglés. Las conversaciones deberían ir puntuadas con guiones largos en lugar de comillas. No tenía ni idea y debo admitir que me resulta un poco confuso. Aun así, haré algunos cambios en mi estilo de escritura.
Is it okay if I giggle at you and the Kid Brother? I know he can be a handful, but you two are funny and sweet together.
You’re a better man than I; if I had dropped clothes pins even four times I would have foot stomped, cursed and probably given up!
Bob:
Giggle away. Once I tell the tale, I find it funny, too. And I often am laughing to myself during our conversations (while I’m pulling the rest of my hair out).
Boud here to sympathize with your phoning predicament with KB. Phoning can be traumatic for anyone with difficulty navigating life, and he seems to be struggling. Which makes you struggle, sigh. Hang in! Well, you do hang in, and more.
Boud:
I just like telling the tales of my conversations with KB. Gotta love him.
I know how awkward and frustrating one-word-answer conversations can be. Hope someone can help KB with his phone. I know nothing about Face Time, but perhaps he “borrowed” someone else’s phone?
Do have that large G&T – a little of what you fancy does you good! Jx
Jon:
I wish I COULD have that large G&T. Not allowed right now. When I begged the doctor, she said I could have a tiny little weak one. What’s the point?
That photo of the two of you is adorable! The smiles are great! It must be really exhausting talking with your brother as you have to carry on the entire conversation. That’s not easy, especially on the phone. I admire your dedication to improving your Spanish. I just started studying French again. I read somewhere that learning a language helps with your cognitive abilities as you age. So I am at it again trying to improve my French!
Michael:
Good for you taking on French again. I hope you’re enjoying it.
I am enjoying it. I am hoping to go to France next May, so I have a real goal to work for as I want to be able to converse with confidence.
Michael,
I love to do that before I travel. I try to learn the basics of any language, so I can apologize for not speaking it when I get there!
Same here. I learned French in high school and a bit in college. I grew up near the Canadian border so French was the logical language to learn.
Michael:
I had French in 4th and 5th grade and loved it. Then we moved and I didn’t have a language until 7th grade. I had no choice and was given Spanish. I’m not sorry now.
A test of love and patience. I wonder what you favorite curse word is, I bet it starts with F.
David:
You didn’t even have to think about it. Yes, it starts with F and I’m sure you’ve heard me use it.
Oh look at that couple of cuties!!
Now THAT would be one BIG drinkj.
Where did that j come from?
Jim:
Drinkj is Norwegian for drink, isn’t it? (NOT!)
Jim:
Imagine a gin & tonic in THAT “glass”!
That picture just charms me. The eyes! The cuteness! The dollar bill taped to the wall! And of course the specified BAR lamp.
I know it’s frustrating as hell, trying to communicate with your brother, trying to help him from afar.
“I’ll go at the end of the month.”
Again, he sounds a lot like our friend Tom.
Ms. Moon
Ms. Moonsigh:
If Tom is at the level of a 6-year-old, they’re very much alike. My mother thought that bar was extremely tacky. We kids loved it. I made pretend drinks for KB and then I would cut him off because I told him he was too drunk. He thought I was hilarioius.
Yes. In many things Tom is at the level of a six year old.
It’s too bad there’s no member of the staff that Chuck likes and has a good rapport with–it would be so helpful at times like these. Do they make much effort to build relationships with the residents? I realize Chuck might still be too stubborn to ask for help even if he did have a friend in the office, though.
J Barlow:
There’s constant turnover in the office. Sadly, he hasn’t like the staff for a number of years (and I can understand why). Often, the manager (like this one) doesn’t seem to have any understanding of developmentally disabled adults. When manager and staff were good at times, he loved visiting them.
I didn’t know there was a way to FaceTime from an iPhone to an Android. My son and his wife are the only ones not in “the cult”, but I doubt he’s worried about not seeing my face when we talk.
Unless there’s some medical reason you shouldn’t have it, I say go make yourself a big (or small) G&T.
Kelly:
WhatsApp works well for chatting and video. As for the G&T, too many medical reasons at the moment. I asked (begged) the doctor and she said I could have a very weak and small one. I asked, what’s the point?
Don’t change your writing style too much. If you use a past participle wrong, I’m sure not going to notice.
Kirk:
If you’re not reading the Spanish, you have nothing to worry about.
I could use that home bar in my house. The two of you are really cute in the photo. The phone calls are not cute for you, but congratulations on making the effort.
Love,
Janie
janiejunebug:
When I was a kid, I always thought a home bar was cool. As an adult, I’ve had well-stocked liquor cabinets but never a bar.
I love that old photo!
I feel for you, dealing with your brother on the phone. I wonder how on earth he Facetimed you? How did that even happen? Very weird. Have you tried Skype with him? Dave and I Skype with his parents (who are technologically challenged) and it’s simple enough that they manage, for what it’s worth.
I have never heard of the “preterite.” Do we even have that in English?
Steve:
My only guess is that someone at work showed him FaceTime. We use WhatsApp, which when he doesn’t delete it from his phone, works beautifully and easily. When I set him up it was a toss up between Skype and WhatsApp. Random decision for me. Preterite in English is the simple past tense.
Oh Scoot, I think you do a great job with your brother, especially being half a world away! And we all have days or times when patience runs mighty thin, so drop kick those clothespins across the room and treat yourself to that large G&T or Lindt chocolate, LOL!
Tundra Bunny:
Unfortunately, the G&T is not allowed. I’m due for a small bar of Lindty dark chocolate! The idea of drop-kicking the clothespins sounds wonderful, except I immediately imagine picking up the mess.
But, but, but… did you get to watch the rest of the last episode of Fellow Travelers? I actually went back and started re-watching it from the first episode… I can only do that with really good shows. It’s kind of interesting to observe the characters and the situations again, with new knowledge about how their lives will go later on.
I would love that Spanish grammar book at this point, I think… I loved refining my French with that kind of book. And, they do the same thing in French, with long dashes to show dialogue, instead of quotation marks. Comma usage can be different in French than in English, too.
Grrr… I do hope you and Chuck get this straightened out, this FaceTime thing. Gosh, it must be hard for you to have to resign yourself to just taking a deep breath and not being able to fix the problem.
Judy C:
Yes, I was bit stressed, but we did finish the last episode … and it was amazing. I think I take too many deep breaths and then forget to exhale!
As I learn Spanish I wonder if I should bother with proper grammar to start or worry about that later and fine tune the crude stuff I know.
Urspo:
Worry about proper grammar later. To start, just relax and find ways to make yourself understood — in my opinion at least. That’s what has worked for me.
It seems I am doing it that way regardless.
Look at you two cuties! I love the idea of a home bar, but wouldn’t entertain enough to really get good use of it. How frustrating about the office staff. Just another unnecessary obstacle. Olivia
Olivia:
I always imagined having a very cool home bar as part of my very cool living room in my very cool bachelor pad. My uncle’s bar was not very cool and in a low-ceilinged basement. But when I was a kid, I loved it.
Love that bar picture, it seems everyone had one in the basement, so funny to see you two, great memory. Looking after a close one, if you live in town, is a challenge but if you live abroad it is another matter all together and you have done so very well. Am sure the kid brother appreciates it in his own way.
larrymuffin:
They were our only family members with a bar in the basement. We were deprived!