My worn-out hose / Mi manguera gastada

La versión en español está después de la versión en inglés.

San Geraldo and I had an appointment today in Málaga. I took a shower late yesterday (I also showered this morning before the appointment). Before yesterday’s shower, however, I buzz-cut my head and trimmed my beard. After the shower, I shaved around my beard to make myself look chic — or at least more presentable. Before I rinsed the cream (shaving) from my face, with no water running, I checked myself in the mirror.

There was a sudden loud, rushing, hissing sound. I had no idea what it was until I realised my legs were getting wet. The fabric hose connecting the faucet to the hot water on my pedestal sink had frayed and burst. I tried turning the water off from the main control on the opposite wall, but I turned and turned to no avail. I tried turning the hot water off directly at its connection to the hose but the knob wouldn’t budge. I ran for towels and the tool box and yelled for help from San Geraldo. He also tried turning the water off from the hot hose connection and got nowhere. I told him I had tried behind the door with no success. He tried again. I had stopped turning too soon. Meanwhile, San Geraldo was drenched from head to toe and I had used a dozen beach towels to keep the water from running onto the wood floor in my office while hoping none was going to find our downstairs neighbours. There was still a quick drip from near the hose. I managed to slow it by turning the main water knob a bit tighter, but there remained a slow drip down the wall that couldn’t be captured entirely by the Tupperware container I had placed below. I piled more towels and replaced them during the night and again before we headed into Málaga this morning.

I had great plans to drag San Geraldo to a museum. But there was no time. We at least had time for lunch at the Carmen Thyssen Museum café (daily menu with great choices for only €11.90), around the corner from our meeting, and returned home just in time to greet the plumber who replaced both faucets (and in the case of the bathroom, the applicable hoses) all for a mere €100.

Still, I’m not happy I missed out on a day in the big city and I’m considering going back after the gym tomorrow, even though it will be without San Geraldo. But I figure he owes me one, so maybe we’ll do something cultural together next week — now that I have a brand new hose. The top photo was our view of the sky while we enjoyed lunch at the museum.


San Geraldo y yo teníamos una cita hoy en Málaga. Ayer me duché tarde (también me duché esta mañana antes de la cita). Sin embargo, antes de la ducha de ayer, me corté la cabeza y me corté la barba. Después de la ducha, me afeité alrededor de la barba para lucir elegante, o al menos más presentable. Antes de enjuagar la crema (afeitado) de mi cara, sin correr agua, me miré en el espejo.

Hubo un repentino sonido fuerte, rápido y sibilante. No tenía idea de qué era hasta que me di cuenta de que mis piernas se estaban mojando. La manguera de tela que conectaba el grifo con el agua caliente de mi fregadero de pedestal se había deshilachado y reventado. Traté de apagar el agua del control principal en la pared opuesta, pero giré y giré sin éxito. Intenté cerrar el agua caliente directamente en su conexión a la manguera, pero la perilla no se movía. Corrí por toallas y la caja de herramientas y grité pidiendo ayuda a San Geraldo. También trató de cerrar el agua de la conexión de la manguera caliente y no consiguió nada. Le dije que lo había intentado detrás de la puerta sin éxito. Lo intentó de nuevo. Había dejado de girar demasiado pronto. Mientras tanto, San Geraldo estaba empapado de pies a cabeza y yo había usado una docena de toallas de playa para evitar que el agua se derramara sobre el piso de madera de mi oficina mientras esperaba que nadie encontrara a nuestros vecinos de abajo. Todavía había un goteo rápido cerca de la manguera. Logré reducir la velocidad girando la perilla de agua principal un poco más fuerte, pero seguía goteando lentamente por la pared que no podía ser capturado por completo por el recipiente Tupperware que había colocado debajo. Amontoné más toallas y las reemplacé durante la noche y nuevamente antes de dirigirnos a Málaga esta mañana.

Tenía grandes planes para arrastrar a San Geraldo a un museo. Pero no hubo tiempo. Al menos tuvimos tiempo para almorzar en la cafetería del Museo Carmen Thyssen (menú diario con excelentes opciones por solo 11,90 €), a la vuelta de la esquina de nuestra reunión, y regresamos a casa justo a tiempo para saludar al fontanero que reemplazó ambos grifos (y en el caso del baño, las mangueras correspondientes) todo por tan solo 100€.

Aún así, no estoy feliz de haberme perdido un día en la gran ciudad y estoy considerando volver después del gimnasio mañana, aunque será sin San Geraldo. Pero me imagino que me debe una, así que tal vez hagamos algo cultural juntos la próxima semana — ahora que tengo una manguera nueva. La foto superior era nuestra vista del cielo mientras disfrutábamos del almuerzo en el museo.

• We both had quiche as a starter.
• Ambos tuvimos quiche como entrante.
• San Geraldo’s chicken curry.
• Pollo de curry de San Geraldo.
• My pork loin in sweet wine sauce.
• Mi lomo de cerdo en salsa de vino dulce.
• San Geraldo’s profiteroles.
• Los profiteroles de San Geraldo.
• My brownie.
• Mi brownie.
• My tired old hose.
• Mi manguera vieja y cansada.
• My leaky old faucet.
• Mi viejo grifo que gotea.

Click the thumbnails to enlarge.
Haz clic en las miniaturas para ampliar.

Author: Moving with Mitchell

From Brooklyn, New York; to North Massapequa; back to Brooklyn; Brockport, New York; back to Brooklyn... To Boston, Massachusetts, where I met Jerry... To Marina del Rey, California; Washington, DC; New Haven and Guilford, Connecticut; San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, and Santa Barbara, California; Las Vegas, Nevada; Irvine, California; Sevilla, Spain. And Fuengirola, Málaga..

28 thoughts on “My worn-out hose / Mi manguera gastada”

  1. I’ve had some showers because of plumbing problems. The first time it happened water was spraying all over the kitchen and I couldn’t shut it off! I ran to the neighbor’s house and shouted WATER! Then I made wooshing noises and ran back home. The neighbor came to help me and got the water shut off and even fixed the problem after speaking with our mutual plumber on the phone. It’s always startling when you suddenly get sprayed with water.


    1. janienjunebug:
      We had an explosion in our pipes (that turned out to be not much more than garden houses) in our apartment in Seville. Boiling hot water (from an out of control water) running through the walls and out of the toilet… for more than a month. It’s why we moved. I should share those photos again.

      1. janiejunebug:
        It WAS insane. I fought with the building manager for weeks and we finally simply moved down to the beach at least 6 months sooner than we had discussed. I’ll share those photos again.

    1. Jim:
      The bigger lesson for me is “Listen to Isabel.” She showed me the frayed house ages ago and I forgot about it. She said this would happen.

    1. Frank:
      I wish I had photos of the actual disaster itself but I was being a responsible adult and attacking the problem. I’m disappointed in myself.

    1. Chrissoup:
      It IS always something! But, today (at least so far), I’ve got plenty of nuthin’ and nuthin’s plenty for me.

    1. Jon:
      All that was missing was the gin. I haven’t had one of those for ages. Maybe I’m due.

  2. Oh my God, Mitchell! What a scene you’ve painted. Plumbing problems are just the worst, aren’t they. I can’t believe you got it fixed for $100. I haven’t met a plumber here in the states who would even show up without at least that much just to darken your doorway. Talk about a deal!

    The food, as always, looks wonderful. I’m partial to quiche.

  3. I want to make a flirty comment about pics of you in the shower to prove it happened, but I just feel bad about the whole burst hose trauma. Glad you got it fixed relatively quickly.

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