People Di[e]? / ¿La gente muere?

La versión en español está después de la versión en inglés.

MAYBE TOMORROW, I’LL SEND OFF all the documents to the company in London that’s fullfilling the US requirement of a Medallion Guaranty — a post-9/11 thing that can’t be done in Spain, but is needed to finally get a few remaining items of my mother’s transferred to my name. If all goes well, we should have the Medallion Guarantee within four weeks.

I was back at the US Consulate today to get one final document notarized. The other six final documents simply needed to be witnessed by a lawyer. We did that Friday when we paid the Spanish lawyer €140 for six signatures and stamps, pleasant conversation, and two cups of café con leche. Today, I went alone and paid the US consular agent €43 for one stamp and poor treatment. The woman is a nightmare. She never smiled, snarled often, and I thought she might bite me. But I was sickeningly sweet (a toadie) the entire time. Well, most of the time. She snapped at me to write the date. I did so — automatically using the European standard of day/month/year. She screeched, “I told you month/day/year! This is an American stamp!” I smiled and said, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t hear you say that. I just automatically wrote it the way the rest of the world does.” Still sweet, but perhaps a little sarcastic. Besides, I have no idea how the rest of the world does it.

San Geraldo mentioned to our lawyer Friday that I was headed to the consulate today. I rolled my eyes; she laughed and said, “Hasn’t she retired yet?” (My guess is she’s got a number of years remaining.)

From home the consulate is around 5 km/3.2 miles round trip. A nice walk. I had hoped to get caught in the rain, but it didn’t happen. There’s a high probability of rain these next few days and, somewhere in Fuengirola right this minute, it’s supposedly coming down. Not here.

San Geraldo picked up pizza last night (sometimes it’s all we can manage) and stopped at the bakery along the way. Although they were again out of the baked merengues I’ve craved, he brought home something for after dinner and something for after lunch today. My abs appear. My abs disappear.

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QUIZÁS MAÑANA, ENVIARÉ TODOS LOS documentos a la empresa en Londres que cumple con el requisito de Estados Unidos de una Garantía Medallion, una cosa posterior al 11 de septiembre (2001) que no se puede hacer en España, pero que finalmente se necesita para obtener algunos elementos restantes de mi madre transferidos a mi nombre. Si todo va bien, deberíamos tener la Garantía Medallion en cuatro semanas.

Regresé al Consulado de los Estados Unidos hoy para obtener un documento final ante notario. Los otros seis documentos finales simplemente necesitaban ser presenciados por una abogada. Lo hicimos ese viernes cuando le pagamos a la abogada española 140 € por seis firmas y sellos, una conversación agradable, y dos tazas de café con leche. Hoy fui solo y le pagué al agente consular de los Estados Unidos 43 € por una estampilla y un mal trato. La mujer es una pesadilla. Ella nunca sonreía, gruñía a menudo, y pensé que podría morderme. Pero fui repugnantemente dulce todo el tiempo. Bueno, la mayoría del tiempo. Me gritó que escribiera la fecha. Lo hice, utilizando automáticamente el estándar europeo de día / mes / año. Gritó: “¡Te lo dije mes / día / año! ¡Este es un sello estadounidense!” Sonreí y dije: “Oh, lo siento. No te escuché decir eso. Lo escribí automáticamente como lo hace el resto del mundo.” Todavía dulce, pero quizás un poco sarcástico. Además, no tengo idea de cómo lo hace el mundo entero.

San Geraldo le mencionó a nuestro abogado el viernes que hoy me dirigía al consulado. Puse los ojos en blanco; se rió y dijo: “¿No se ha jubilado todavía?” (Supongo que le quedan varios años).

Desde casa, el consulado está a unos 5 km de ida y vuelta. Buen paseo. Tenía la esperanza de quedar atrapado en la lluvia, pero no sucedió. Hay una alta probabilidad de que llueva en los próximos días y, en algún lugar de Fuengirola en este momento, supuestamente está bajando. Aqui no.

San Geraldo recogió pizza anoche (a veces es todo lo que podemos manejar) y se detuvo en la panadería en el camino. Aunque de nuevo estaban fuera de los merengues horneados que tanto ansiaba, trajo a casa algo para después de la cena y algo para después del almuerzo de hoy. Aparecen mis abdominales. Mis abdominales desaparecen.

• This exercise place gets me every time. PEOPLE DI[E] (Fitness Beauty Health). What a tagline.
• Este lugar de ejercicio me atrapa todo el tiempo. PEOPLE DI suena como “People Die” [la gente muere]. Qué lema.
• After lunch. The interior of the white and black seen at top. To Di[e] for. Filled with cabello de angel (angel hair), a preserve made from the yellow fibers inside a pumpkin.
• Después del almuerzo. El interior del blanco y negro visto en la parte superior. Relleno de cabello de ángel.
• After dinner last night. Unbaked merengue. Worth a try. Not worth another.
• Después de cenar anoche. Merengue crudo. Vale la pena intentarlo. No vale otro.
• On the way to the consulate. The original downtown Fuengirola train station. Now part of a tourism office.
• De camino al consulado. La original estación de tren del centro de Fuengirola. Ahora forma parte de una oficina de turismo.
• On the beach on my way home. Sardines on a spit.
• En la playa de camino a casa. Un espeto.

Author: Moving with Mitchell

From Brooklyn, New York; to North Massapequa; back to Brooklyn; Brockport, New York; back to Brooklyn... To Boston, Massachusetts, where I met Jerry... To Marina del Rey, California; Washington, DC; New Haven and Guilford, Connecticut; San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, and Santa Barbara, California; Las Vegas, Nevada; Irvine, California; Sevilla, Spain. And Fuengirola, Málaga..

29 thoughts on “People Di[e]? / ¿La gente muere?”

    1. Mistress Borghese:
      Yep. I had another word in mind, but I hate to insult all the other c$#ts in the world.

  1. The biatche consular agent is clearly yet another PPO. Not like you needed another one of those in your life, but fortunately, you don’t have to see her too often. Hope the drama with all the legal paperwork is coming to an end. Soul-sucking.

    Bet those sardines are scrumptious. Nothing like what most US folk think of when it comes to sardines.

    1. Mary:
      Although I’ve developed a taste for good anchovies (like the ones at Mesón Salvador), I don’t think I’ll ever become a fan of sardines like these. But, sardines and anchovies here absolutely nothing like what I had in the States. There, I couldn’t even be in the same room.

      Fortunately, we rarely need to go to the consulate. Maybe the next time won’t be until we have to renew our passports. And maybe by then she’ll have retired

  2. Medallion signature guarantees, my father left me needing three of those nightmares. If you survive that, you are good for anything.

    1. David:
      If my mother had put these five stocks in both our names like she did everything else, we wouldn’t have spent 5 years and a lot of money doing this. (She even told me she had done it.) Five Medallion Guarantees, too, from here! It makes me feel better to know you, too, think it’s a nightmare. And you know what you’re doing. We didn’t have a clue. HOWEVER, it’s almost over. The company in London will check out all our paperwork and we’re hoping nothing has to be redone before they send it on. We can see the finish line!

  3. That woman is a piece of work, isn’t she? Because of that date-writing conflict I usually write dates longhand, i.e. “Sept 13, 2021,” but sometimes people aren’t happy with that either. You can’t win.

    1. Steve:
      I do as you with dates; however I do 13 Sept 2021. This, however, was a form with separated boxes for each portion and I simply did what I always do here. She’s so abusive whatever she says. I asked her the date and she responded like a bratty teen-ager (in a really snarky tone, of course). September 13. All day, last I looked.

  4. I hate little “mini-Hitler” bureaucrats like that, ruling their tiny fiefdoms and delighting in having people obey their every command. But whatever power they have over you in the situation, those bastards will use it to make your life a misery if they can.

    1. Debra:
      That’s a perfect description of this woman. And anyone I’ve met who’s dealt with her has said the same thing.

  5. The only way to deal with people like that is to be sickly sweet…sounds like you achieved that. Food is life my friend, as I have realized these last few months. Food is an extreme pleasure to some (you and me I think), work out but enjoy those treats!!!!!!!

    1. Cheapchick:
      SG loses his patience with her very quickly. The first time we were there (to renew our passports), she was of course awful. Everything was negative, difficult, incorrect. She expected that we would have registered with her when we moved to the area. At the end, she snapped, “Why haven’t I ever seen you here?!?” SG blurted out, “Because we don’t want to be seen!” And he walked out the door. I said, “Thanks so much for your help” before I walked out behind him. It’s better when I go alone. I DO enjoy the treats and I wish I could send you everything we try.

      1. I am good with treats. Sweet hubby got me 30 hand rolled chocolates for my birthday from my favorite chocolatier in town. I finished them all off in 10 days! (I shared with him lol)

      2. Cheapchick:
        30 hand-rolled chocolate over 10 days. And you shared. You have incredible willpower!

      3. Cheapchick:
        Forgot to mention. SG came home yesterdays with two boxes of chocolates and four pastries from the bakery. Pastries are gone. Chocolate might last a few days.

  6. It makes so much more sense to start with the small unit (day), move to the middle-sized (month), and finish up big (year). Similar to Steve, but different, I write 12 Sep 2021 on customs and immigration forms when traveling unless something different is specified.
    The brick and stonework on the old depot is lovely.

    1. Wilma:
      I write the date exactly as you do. I hate when the forms have individual boxes or underscores you have to use. Apparently, the brick and stonework is exactly as it appeared when new. I’ve seen many photos. I think that building contains the private offices because there’s now a very nice contemporary addition for the public.

  7. Whenever I come across a Hitlerette like the one you described, I remind myself that the person is completely bereft of power at home and/or in their personal life and so they delight in welding what they do have at work like a mace! I do my best not to give them the satisfaction of any reaction at all other than benign Canadian politeness, LOL! Soul-suckers don’t deserve any of my energy.

    1. Tundra Bunny:
      Then you’ll be proud of me, I hid all my New York City fierceness under my version of Canadian politeness.

      1. You only have to master the art of “sorry, not sorry” instead of “pew, pew, mofo!”…. LOL!

    1. Judy C:
      I don’t remember which episode either, but I DO remember the line. And I even used it when SG and I were talking about some other things yesterday!

  8. That woman’s brain must be a terrible place to live – I can’t imagine she isn’t in constant pain.

    1. sillygirl:
      I agree. Everything about her is caustic, negative, and unpleasant — even when she’s seemingly being pleasant (which is rare). There’s an edge to everything. I wouldn’t want to be her.

  9. I vary between being sweet to rude people and joining them in their bitch-itude.
    Sweet sometimes pays off more because I don’t get mad, but the other person gets very angry.
    I win!

    1. Bob:
      I mostly try to be sweet, but sometimes I can’t help myself. With her, I know she’s all we have for now, so I bite my tongue and smile. Two visits ago I needed something notarized (this same crap). A couple came in at the same time as me. The woman had lost her passport and they were supposed to fly somewhere else in 3 days. She was distraught. The agent told her they couldn’t come in without a passport. I played representative and explained their situation and told her I would wait until after she had helped them. The agent said everything she could to make them more stressed until the woman was in tears. I had a brief talk with the couple while the agent was on the phone, gave them my phone to make calls, helped them find some things they needed. At the end, after calling Madrid, she told them the passport could be delivered to their hotel in 2 days. They asked why she didn’t tell them that might be possible in the first place. She said, “Well I didn’t want to get your hopes up!”

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