Orchids With Teeth / Orquídeas Con Dientes

La versión en español está después de la versión en inglés (y antes de las fotos).

San Geraldo has completed three of four teeth-cleaning appointments. Like so many people, he hates going to the dentist. Unfortunately, it pains him so much that he has to spread a cleaning over four visits instead of getting it over with in one or two.

My teeth are now clean and sparkly. Although I was apprehensive about my visit to the dentist (I have no idea why), everything went perfectly and easily. And I’m going to get braces!!! My bottom teeth have always needed straightening, but that requires my top teeth to be done as well to ensure everything aligns. I can now get Invisalign braces (clear polyurethane) and can finally stop complaining about my teeth. I’m so excited.

When I was told the cost, I hesitated and said I’d need to talk it over with San Geraldo. In my 45-minute walk home from the orthodontist, I talked myself into and out of it a few times.

I thought, ‘Well, if I do this, I can’t complain about San Geraldo blowing money at the casino.’

Then I thought, ‘But if I do this, there won’t be any money left for San Geraldo to blow at the casino.’

And then I thought, ‘Of course there will!’

When I got home, San Gerald immediately insisted it was worth it if it would make me happy. I knew he would say that without hesitation.

He continued, “Besides, then you can’t lecture me about going to the casino!”

To distract from the dental stress, below are the rest of my orchid photos from the Orchidarium in Estepona.

San Geraldo ha completado tres de cuatro citas de limpieza de dientes. Como tanta gente, odia ir al dentista. Le duele tanto que tiene que repartir una limpieza de cuatro visitas en lugar de terminar con una o dos.

Mis dientes están ahora limpios y brillantes. Aunque estaba preocupado por mi visita al dentista (no tengo ni idea de por qué), todo fue perfectamente y fácilmente. ¡Voy a conseguir brackets! Mis dientes inferiores siempre han necesitado enderezarse, pero eso requiere que mis dientes superiores se hagan también para asegurar que todo se alinee. Ahora puedo obtener brackets Invisalign y finalmente puedo dejar de quejarse de mis dientes.

Cuando me dijeron cuánto costaría, dije que tendría que hablar con San Geraldo. En mi camino de 45 minutos, hablé conmigo mismo.

Pensé: “Si hago esto, no puedo quejarme de que San Geraldo haya perdido dinero en el casino.”

Entonces pensé: ‘Pero si hago esto, no habrá dinero para que San Geraldo pierda en el casino.’

Y entonces pensé: “¡Claro que sí!”

Cuando llegué a casa, San Geraldo inmediatamente insistió en que valía la pena si me hacía feliz. Sabía que él diría eso sin vacilar.

Él continuó: “¡Además, entonces no te puedes quejar si voy al casino!”

Para distraer del estrés dental, aquí están más orquídeas del Orchidarium en Estepona.


Cup Size? ¿Talla De Copa?

Trying English followed by Spanish again. I hope both versions make sense! 

Tratando de inglés seguido de español de nuevo. Espero que ambas versiones tengan sentido!

When I was around 11, my father was backing up a bit before pulling out of a parking space on Brighton Beach Avenue in Brooklyn. My father, who was a very competent driver, slammed hard into a fire hydrant.

I looked up in shock and asked, “What happened?”

My Mother The Dowager Duchess responded with mild annoyance, “Your father was distracted by a pair of double-Ds!”

I didn’t know what that meant until I turned to see a woman with very large breasts displayed to perfection in a skin-tight sweater. I figured it out. Although I couldn’t understand why it would be a distraction.

Note: None of the below lovely flowers’ cups, seen last week at the Orchidarium of Estepona, are double-Ds, but they’re much more worthy of a second look.

Cuando yo tenía 11 años, mi padre apoyó el coche antes de salir de una plaza de aparcamiento en Brighton Beach Avenue en Brooklyn. Él, que era un conductor muy competente, se estrelló fuertemente en una boca de incendios. 

Yo pregunté, “¿Qué pasó?” 

Mi Madre La Duquesa Viuda respondió, “¡Tu padre se distrajo con un par de doble-D!” 

No sabía lo que eso significaba hasta que me volví y vi a una mujer con pechos muy grandes exhibida a la perfección en un suéter. Entendí ‘doble-D.’ Aunque no podía entender por qué sería una distracción. 

Nota: Ninguna de estas copas de flores, visto la semana pasada en el Orchidarium de Estepona, son doble-D, pero merecen una segunda mirada. 

What A Stinker

We were back in Estepona Wednesday to visit the Orchidarium. I’ve been monitoring the place online. The first time we were there, in November (click here), we had just missed most of the blooming season, but it’s begun again. What is thought to be the largest flower in the world, Amorphophallus titanum (titan arum), reached its peak March 13. It was the first time it had ever bloomed in Spain. I saw it online but we missed an up close and personal visit.

TOWER OF THE 18TH-CENTURY CHURCH OF OUR LADY OF LOS REMEDIOS IN BACKGROUND.

Rather than miss anything else of significance, I suggested we take our neighbors with us and pay the orchid house a visit. I was pleased that the titan arum was still on display. You might know it by one of its more common names, Corpse Flower — because that’s what it smells like. The first two photos are the remains (corpse?) of the Corpse Flower with a section cut out to give access to the seeds. Check out our friend’s reaction to the powerful floral “bouquet.” It really does reek.

WHAT WE MISSED. MARCH 14, ONE DAY AFTER IT PEAKED.

The plant that can make it all real…