You mean Dr. Hackenbush? / ¿Te refieres al Dr. Hackenbush?

San Geraldo drove me to the hospital Monday where I had all 19 staples removed. I’m amazed by the abilities of some healthcare professionals. I felt a tiny sting at the removal of two of the staples. Other than that, I had no idea the nurse had done them all. It was a bit tender for about 24 hours, but it’s quite nice to not have a ridge of metal sticking out of my back. I was even able to sit up in the car for the 20 minutes there and then back. Plus sitting in the waiting room for 15 minutes (well, sitting and standing; the sitting did get tiring). Then there was the walk in the parking lot and through the long halls of the medical centre. The only discomfort was the sciatica at times, and that’s been a lot worse.

The next big milestone will be meeting with the surgeon 9 August, which is when I will supposedly be given the all-clear to exercise and stretch. And life will begin to return to normal. Tuesday wasn’t the best of days. Monday’s adventure was a bit too much, I guess. Still, I’m better than last week.

I’ve been craving jelly beans since returning home Monday. I have no idea where to find sugar-free gourmet jelly beans (or even sugary gourmet jelly beans) in Fuengirola. I checked online, but I only want a small bag. Shipping will cost more than the jelly beans. I’ll have another nectarine.

I spoke with The Kid Brother last night. When I told him my next appointment is in early August to get the all-clear from the surgeon, he asked, “You mean Dr. Hackenbush?”

If you don’t know him, he was a Groucho Marx character (pictured above right).

I said, “That’s the guy! You know my doctor?”

He said, “He’s a quack!”

NOW he tells me.

San Geraldo me llevó al hospital el lunes donde me quitaron las 19 grapas. Me sorprenden las habilidades de algunos profesionales de la salud. Sentí un pequeño escozor al quitarme dos de las grapas. Aparte de eso, no tenía idea de que la enfermera los había hecho todos. Estuve un poco sensible durante aproximadamente 24 horas, pero es bastante agradable no tener una cresta de metal sobresaliendo de mi espalda. Incluso pude sentarme en el auto durante los 20 minutos de ida y vuelta. Además de estar sentado en la sala de espera durante 15 minutos (bueno, sentado y de pie; estar sentado se cansó). Luego estaba el paseo por el aparcamiento y por los largos pasillos del centro médico. La única molestia era la ciática a veces, y eso ha sido mucho peor.

El próximo gran hito será la reunión con el cirujano el 9 de agosto, que es cuando supuestamente me darán el visto bueno para hacer ejercicio y estirarme. Y la vida comenzará a volver a la normalidad. El martes no fue el mejor de los días. Supongo que la aventura del lunes fue demasiado. Aún así, estoy mejor que la semana pasada.

He estado deseando jelly beans desde que regresé a casa el lunes. No tengo ni idea de dónde encontrar jelly beans gourmet sin azúcar (o incluso gourmet azucaradas) en Fuengirola. Revisé en línea, pero solo quiero una bolsa pequeña. El envío costará más que las gominolas. Tomaré otra nectarina.

Hablé con El Hermanito anoche. Cuando le dije que mi próxima cita es a principios de agosto para obtener el visto bueno del cirujano, preguntó: “¿Te refieres al Dr. Hackenbush?”

Si no lo conoces, era un personaje de Groucho Marx (en la foto de arriba a la derecha).

Dije: “¡Ese es el tipo! ¿Conoces a mi médico?”

Él dijo: “¡Es un charlatán!”

AHORA me dice.

• “PRESS THE RIGHT BUTTON TO OPEN” — as opposed to the wrong one.
• En inglés, “right” significa “derecha” O “correcta.” Entonces, este puede significa “presione el botón correcta para abrir.” Una traducción literal del español sería más clara (y, sí, estoy siendo ridículamente quisquilloso).

Author: Moving with Mitchell

From Brooklyn, New York; to North Massapequa; back to Brooklyn; Brockport, New York; back to Brooklyn... To Boston, Massachusetts, where I met Jerry... To Marina del Rey, California; Washington, DC; New Haven and Guilford, Connecticut; San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, and Santa Barbara, California; Las Vegas, Nevada; Irvine, California; Sevilla, Spain. And Fuengirola, Málaga..

32 thoughts on “You mean Dr. Hackenbush? / ¿Te refieres al Dr. Hackenbush?”

    1. Bob,
      My calls with KB in recent weeks have begun a bit apprehensively, especially since I haven’t been comfortable for long in any position. But he has made me smile every time.

  1. You are unstapled. Have taken X-rays to confirm you don’t have a lost screw? I kept the x-rays as proof. (Full size old fashioned film.) Doc Spo says all docs are quacks.

  2. When the Staples were in it’s a shame you didn’t go into any places with metal detectors .. that would have been funny!

    1. Mistress Borghese,
      Well I’ve still got the permanent little metal plate and two screws. That’s something to look forward to.

  3. Happy for you that this is moving along and that you can return to a more normal routine. Strange that they don’t have jellybeans mind you I don’t ever remember seeing them in Spain.

    1. Laurent,
      Oh, they have jelly beans, just not gourmet sugar-free in Fuengirola. I still might order some online. I found loads of them.

    1. Debra,
      The wordplay is often way too sophisticated for KB, but he regularly quotes them. Because the delivery alone is so funny. Once, I tried to explain “Why a duck” to him. I don’t know what I was thinking!

  4. I’m so glad your removal was relatively painless. I don’t remember my experience being quite that pleasant.

    I guess Jelly Bellies aren’t global.

    Priceless exchange with your brother!

    1. Kelly,
      KB sometimes makes me crazy and mostly makes me smile. Jelly Bellys are global. I just haven’t seen the sugar-free variety in local shops. The removal of the staples was a breeze, surprisingly. Getting into position face down was not. I had staples removed one other time here. Also easy. I have a feeling a lot depends on the nurse.

    1. Jon,
      We do have shops in Fuengirola that sell jelly beans. I’ve just never seen sugar-free. I’ll probably order some online today… or go crazy and buy a tiny bag with sugar.

  5. Haaaa!
    And, such good news about the staples! Little by little, Mitchell, little by little, and moving in the right direction (ha! not the wrong one 😉

    1. Judy C,
      Yes. Little by little. I’d prefer a lot by a lot, but that will come soon I think.

  6. Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I do this…
    I know it’s not the Marx Bros., but it’s what popped into my mind. Probably the right brain. As opposed to the wrong one. 😉

    1. Walt the Fourth,
      Nope, not the Marx Bros., but another one of KB’s favorites.

  7. So glad you’re feeling better and finally staple-free.

    Chuck always had a great sense of humor.

  8. A Day at the Races, right?

    Glad the staples are out and hope you find those jelly beans. I didn’t know there was a gourmet version.

    1. Kirk:
      So many different gourmet jelly beans. My favorite at this point is Jelly Belly. A Day at the Races, it is.

  9. Just to add to your crazy wonderful world, I worked with a “Quackenbush” at SMU ~ basketball coach extraordinaire, well loved by all. I used to say, “Hey Quack, what’s up!” We got used to the name like it was a comedy show, MMmmm!

    1. Ron:
      It’s a great name. Chuck and I always screw up the name of the Grouch Marx character and call him Dr. Quackenbush.

  10. I’m glad you’re unstapled but the continuation of the sciatica sucks. We need to scare it away somehow. I’ll start working on a plan.


    1. janiuejunebug:
      The sciatica is frustrating to say the least. At least it’s not as bad as it was.

  11. Sounds like you’ve already had lots of tips on finding jelly beans in Fuengirola, so I won’t go there! I used to love Marx Brothers movies. I haven’t seen one in ages. I think the last one I watched was “A Night at the Opera” with Kitty Carlisle! (I am SO gay.)

    1. Steve,
      I never tire of The Marx Bros. I bought every dvd for KB. Ah, Kitty Carlisle!

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