Barkeeps, bouncers, and the family jewels / Camareros, matones, y las joyas de la familia

La versión en español está después de la versión en inglés.

For those of you who read yesterday’s blog post before I added today’s note, I had that Roman/Russian joke all wrong. I confused two different jokes. The first: “He has a Roman nose.” “Yeah, it’s roamin’ all over his face.” The second: “He has Roman/roamin’ hands and Russian/rushin’ fingers.” It’s not as if I gave no thought to that post. I think the slam into the glass door rattled something loose in my brain.

Karen wrote from back home in Switzerland. Her son, having no idea of our conversation about the Guinness Toucan (click here), walked into the kitchen wearing the perfect sweater. If only I’d seen it before I saw Mulligans.

Dudo and Moose are famous (or perhaps I should say infamous). They were featured Wednesday in Chapter 2 of “The Big Sleazy,” the latest pot boiler about Private Eye HRH Spayed as told by Debra She Who Seeks. You’ll find Dudo and Moose here, but be sure to start from the beginning so you don’t miss any of the excitement. It turns out our seemingly sweet and innocent boys are a couple of lowlifes.

Moose settled between my legs last night for a while. I have to keep at least one leg covered or he won’t cozy up to me. Knowing what I now know from Debra, I’m glad to have the tough guy guarding access to the crown jewels.


Para aquellos de ustedes que leyeron la publicación del blog de ayer antes de que añadiera la nota de hoy, tenía mal ese chiste romano/ruso. Confundí dos chistes diferentes. La primera: “Tiene nariz romana.” “Sí, está vagando por toda su cara.” El segundo: “Tiene manos romanas/deambulantes y dedos rusos/de prisa.” No es como si no hubiera pensado en esa publicación. Creo que el golpe en la puerta de vidrio sacudió algo suelto en mi cerebro.

Karen escribió desde su casa en Suiza. Su hijo, sin tener idea de nuestra conversación sobre el Tucán Guinness (haz clic aquí), entró a la cocina con el suéter perfecto. Si tan solo lo hubiera visto antes de ver a Mulligans.

Dudo y Moose son famosos (o quizás debería decir infames). Aparecieron el miércoles en el Capítulo 2 de The Big Sleazy, la última olla caliente sobre Private Eye HRH Spayed contada por Debra She Who Seeks. Encontrarás a Dudo y Moose aquí, pero asegúrate de comenzar desde el principio para no perderte nada de la emoción. Resulta que nuestros chicos aparentemente dulces e inocentes son un par de maleantes.

Moose se instaló entre mis piernas anoche por un tiempo. Tengo que mantener al menos una pierna cubierta o no se sentirá cómodo conmigo. Sabiendo lo que ahora sé de Debra, me alegra tener al tipo duro protegiendo el acceso a las joyas de la corona.

Karen’s son’s sweater.

El suéter del hijo de Karen.

• Barkeep and proprietor of Dudo’s Dumpster Dive, and his bruiser, Moose. Original portrait © Debra She Who Seeks.
• Barman y propietario de Dudo’s Dumpster Dive (que significa, El Basurero de Buceo de Dudo), y su matón, Moose. Retrato original © Debra She Who Seeks.

Author: Moving with Mitchell

From Brooklyn, New York; to North Massapequa; back to Brooklyn; Brockport, New York; back to Brooklyn... To Boston, Massachusetts, where I met Jerry... To Marina del Rey, California; Washington, DC; New Haven and Guilford, Connecticut; San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, and Santa Barbara, California; Las Vegas, Nevada; Irvine, California; Sevilla, Spain. And Fuengirola, Málaga..

20 thoughts on “Barkeeps, bouncers, and the family jewels / Camareros, matones, y las joyas de la familia”

    1. Karen:
      I remember those Specsavers ads, but I didn’t make the connection. Either way, he should have gone to Mulligans.

  1. When my daughter sends me photos of her (large) black cat in that same position, I tell her it’s not his most flattering view. Not that he cares about my opinion. 😂

    We always speculate what our animals are up to when we aren’t around. Sounds like Dudo and Moose have an exciting alternate life!

    1. Kelly:
      I have a picture of the living room from early this morning that I’ll share today. I can only imagine what was going on.

  2. Moose is definitely a bruiser….a heavy weight…..good to have him on your side….and guarding the family jewels.

    1. Mistress Borghese:
      Yep, Moose is a solid bugger. But Dudo’s a lot slyer. Debra got it right.

  3. Debra is so frickin’ talented. I hate her! Not really 🙂 I love that painting of the boys. Moose has never looked fiercer. I hope you haven’t been traumatized by your face crashing incident.

    1. Deedles:
      I know what you mean. I keep thinking she’ll inspire me to be more creative. Instead I just admire her. My nose just gives me another story to tell when I’m out shopping.

  4. Dudo and Moose make a great team, no matter what milieu they’re in! And perhaps you were simply channeling San Geraldo when you mixed your metaphors yesterday. Maybe your collision with the glass door caused you and him to switch bodies. You know, like “Freaky Friday,” lol

  5. Yup, don’t mess with The Moose — though I suspect that Dudo could deliver substantial cat scratches himself, LOL!

    1. Tundra Bunny:
      They can both do their damage, not that they’d ever intentionally do it to us. But Moose is one solid cat. He’s not easy to push around.

    1. Kirk:
      Oh, I’ve known some people who’ve poured beer on their cereal. I would guess stout works best.

  6. If he can say as you can,
    Guinness is Good for You,
    How grand to be a Toucan,
    Just think what Toucan do.


    PS Love the two butch cats! Dudo and Moose to a tee.

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