La versión en español está después de la versión en inglés.
My first thought when I was told I would have to be in hospital for 5 to 7 days and in bed possibly 1 or 2 days was: “Oh, god, I’m going to have to use a bed pan.” That concerned me more than the surgery. I have no problem peeing into one of those handled containers, but the idea of doing the “other” while propped up on a bed pan, sends me over the edge (but not of the bed pan, I hope).
In 1970, when San Geraldo returned from a student trip to the Soviet Union he arrived home with an intestinal parasite that took him from one extreme to the other (see how subtle I am?). He spent a night in the hospital and there were no beds. He was on a gurney in the hall. He would carry a bedpan down the hall to the toilet and try. When he was finally successful hours later, he had to carry that bedpan back up the hall past all the patients and staff to the nurse’s station. “Look what I did!” I would have died.
Anyway, after a couple of hours of stewing, I realized that by the time I need to “go,” I will likely be allowed out of bed to do it on my own. So now there is absolutely nothing for me to worry about. Nothing at all.
On the same subject, I’ve shared with you today an example of a free public toilet on the beach. These are placed where there might be a large gap between chiringuitos (beach bars) which are required to allow public access to their toilets. Since my walks can be a couple of hours on the beach some days, I’ve had occasion to use these now and again. I don’t love it, but they’re self-cleaning. After each use, the door locks and the entire space is sprayed with cleaners and disinfectants. It’s very cool. I wonder if anyone has ever found a way to stay inside to witness the process. I hope not (but I sure would like to see it).
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Lo primero que pensé cuando me dijeron que tendría que estar en hospital de 5 a 7 días y en cama posiblemente 1 o 2 días, fue: “Oh, Dios, voy a tener que usar un orinal”. Eso me preocupó más que la cirugía. No tengo problemas para orinar en uno de esos recipientes con asa, pero la idea de hacer el “otro” mientras estoy apoyada en una bacinilla me lleva al borde (pero no de la bacinilla, espero).
En 1970, cuando San Geraldo regresaba de un viaje de estudiantes a la Unión Soviética, llegó a casa con un parásito intestinal que lo llevó de un extremo al otro (¿ven qué sutil soy?). Pasó una noche en el hospital y no había camas. Estaba en una camilla en el pasillo. Llevaba un orinal por el pasillo hasta el baño y lo intentaba. Cuando finalmente tuvo éxito, horas más tarde, tuvo que llevar ese orinal de vuelta por el pasillo pasando por todos los pacientes y el personal hasta la estación de enfermería. “¡Mira lo que hice!” Me hubiera muerto.
De todos modos, después de un par de horas de estofado, me di cuenta de que para cuando tenga que “irme”, es probable que me permitan levantarme de la cama para hacerlo por mi cuenta. Así que ahora no hay absolutamente nada de qué preocuparme. Nada en absoluto.
Sobre el mismo tema, hoy he compartido contigo un ejemplo de un baño público gratuito en la playa. Estos se colocan donde puede haber una gran brecha entre los chiringuitos que deben permitir el acceso público a sus baños. Dado que mis paseos pueden ser de un par de horas en la playa algunos días, he tenido la oportunidad de usarlos de vez en cuando. No me encanta, pero se limpian solos. Después de cada uso, la puerta se bloquea y todo el espacio se rocía con limpiadores y desinfectantes. Es muy genial. Me pregunto si alguien ha encontrado alguna vez una manera de quedarse adentro para presenciar el proceso. Espero que no (pero seguro que me gustaría verlo).
• Nunca había visto uno con la puerta abierta.
• Tengo una camisa que iría (no) perfectamente con esos shorts.
Hopefully you will not be as concerned as you are now about using the dreaded bedpan after the surgery.
Those mixes of printed fabric snapped me awake! Yikes!
Have a good day and things will improve.
Jim:
Keeping up with the fashions isn’t easy (on the eyes).
I was already feeling ill from the idea of using a bedpan … who cleans it? Who, um, dumps it? … and then you gave me that leopard thing.
I may take to my bed for the rest of the day.
Bob:
“That leopard thing” clearly gave some thought to the combination. Sorry about the rest. I promise to not be graphic about what happens in hospital.
You will make it through, the people who work there, have seen it all, they certainly have seen worse. There was one of the self cleaning toilets in a train station near Madrid. It was clean in a public space. And the cake in the cafe was wonderful. I can’t remember the name of the city, but I remember the cake.
David:
I don’t care what they’ve seen. It’s all about me. I love that you remember the cake but not the city. I want to go there.
Last week I almost wore a striped shirt with a pair of small checked shorts. Then I thought “Oh no! Mitchell will use his zoom lens all the way from Spain and my photo will end up on his Walk of Shame post!” Phew, that was close! See how you’re making the world a better place?
Debra:
Oh, don’t let me down. Wear the outfit and send me a photo. My drone may not be able to get a clear shot.
I can see how the bedpan would be stress-inducing! Here’s hoping it doesn’t come to that. I’ve used similar self-cleaning public toilets before. I’m always skeptical how well they work, but admittedly they do LOOK clean.
Steve:
These toilets are always clean and they never even smell. Impressive.
I’m so glad to see that you have free toilets still. Here they have just replaced the Nyon station toilet and to enter one has to use a credit card to enter and pay!!! Talk about tracking you. I’ve only seen one person try to use it to date in two weeks.
Karen:
Pay toilets on the beach would be a true IN-convenience.
Oh, the things we worry about. I can remember having to prove that had taken place before I could get discharged after my c-sections. At least it wasn’t in a bed pan.
My research tells me that it’s hyphenated (as an adjective), but is acceptable as a noun without the hyphen. I’ve been accused of being an anal retentive, but in reality I’m just OCD.
Kelly:
The title of this post was actually the title of a book. My kind of book. I am a bit anal retentive and have a bit of OCD.
Curiosity got me so I typed in the title at Amazon to see about the book. No book popped up, but you can imagine all the other things that did! 😳😂
Kelly:
I found it: https://www.amazon.com/Does-Anal-Retentive-Have-Hyphen/dp/0972369201…
I can’t seem to see anything in that second to last shot. Is something blocking the camera??!?!
Mistress Borghese:
I’d tell you to look more closely, but that would just be cruel.
You crack me up! Those automated toilets are all over Paris, and they’ve come in handy a time or two. The same company that made them sold a bunch to San Francisco. There was lots of hand-wringing about the homeless and druggies using them. I’m not sure how that worked out.
Walt the Fourth:
I wonder how it went in San Francisco. There’s no problem with them here, but then they’re on the beach in a tourist town.
If you really need to go, you’ll use the bedpan. It’s like the Nike slogan. Just do it.
Love,
Janie
janiejunebug:
Oh, you don’t know me very well…
According to my adult children, anal and retentive are totally separate…They prefer to simply call me anal, no retentive involved!! If I am being honest, being anal and/or retentive is a pretty awesome trait. Everyone needs an AR person in their life!! At least for a little while!
Anon:
Yeah, “anal” is the way I hear it all the time, too. (And that sounds awful! Sorry.)
Oh the pain. It hurts to see folks in such mismatched loud outfits. I suppose it is the fashion but it is not my style.
Urspo:
I still don’t know if it can safely be called “fashion.” Just a little something they threw together (and I do mean threw).